Regular readers know I love Dan Savage – I think he mostly gives spot-on advice, with an entertaining tropism toward the harsh.
He is generally credited, appropriately, with coining the word “monogamish” to describe that thing some of us do where we live in committed, long-term marriages, in which sex with others is not thought of as some sort of third rail, but rather, as a deepening of our intellectual, emotional, and yes, sexual bonds with our partners.
He explains monogamish-ness so much better than I can.
Listen to the first ten minutes of this podcast, if you’re curious. (He takes a minute or three to get to the point – stick around, or fast forward, for it.)