I’ve traveled a lot, in a lot of places where toilet paper isn’t so much a thing. Wiped my ass with water and my hand a lot. And I learned, a long long time ago, that water cleans ass better than paper.
A few years ago, I made the switch from paper to water here in the States. And let me tell you: I’ve never looked back. [rimshot]
But seriously. The “clean” I feel after my bidet toilet washes my ass is just not to be beaten.
When the toilet paper shortages began some weeks ago, I briefly imagined that all of America would soon learn the superiority of water over paper. But I took the wrong message: the real message is, all of America is terrified of ass.