What turns me on most? What you want.
Not in the passive sense. It’s not that I get off on giving you what you want (though I do). Rather, it’s that, if you want what I want you to want… nothing can be hotter.
Interestingly, this doesn’t mean that I want you to want to please me. I’ve been giving this some thought lately. When someone tells me she wants to please me, I recoil just a tiny bit. I’ve long wondered why, and I think I might have an idea: if you want to please me, that’s a description not of what you want to do for me, but of how you want me to feel about what you do for me. In other words, what you want is wrapped up in my response.
In ways I don’t fully understand, I experience this as a demand and, for this particular dominant guy, nothing is less hot than a demand. Particularly a demand for something that is, ultimately, beyond my control. If you want me to, say, lick your clit… I can do that. Easily.
If you want me to spank you. Or tell you what to wear. Or choose your drink. These all are things I can do. Easily.
But when the things you want of me start to be less within my control… that’s a bit more complicated. For example: if you want me to fuck you, well, that depends on my erection. As you might have gleaned, erections don’t generally elude me. They do, though, fairly often, when fucking is what’s on the menu. How, why, that’s a whole ‘nother subject. Read more about it here. So a woman who wants me to fuck her puts me in a position where I can fail. Where I can disappoint her.
I don’t like disappointing women. I fear disappointing women. I work really hard to avoid situations in which I might disappoint a woman. In fact, it’s safe to say, if there’s a danger I might disappoint a woman, it’s a safe bet that I’ll be turned off. Not on.
On the other hand…
If what a woman wants is to give me what I want, to execute my wishes, to do as I ask… well, then, the sky’s the limit.